Interview and Show - No Dynamics

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The Bagel is in Toronto at 285 College St.

FRIDAY AUGUST 19TH
No Dynamics
Panzram's Ghost
Tradition
+ a special 7-minute set by 10,000 Watt Head
Comedy by Nick Flanagan
DJ Wes Allen

SATURDAY AUGUST 20TH
No Dynamics
Pony da Look
Awesome
+ a special 7-minute set by Broken Tree Fort
Comedy by Nick Flanagan
DJ Wes Allen

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I was kind of joking when I suggested having the members of No Dynamics build something out of Popsicle sticks for this article – sounds like a stupid idea, right? Then I figured it’d be good, because I could use it as an excuse to get this cute girl at the art store to show me where to find everything. I must’ve had no game that day, ‘cause she didn’t seem to give a shit about anything I had to say, and she gave me a blank “whatever” look when I tried to drop the “it’s for Vice” trump card. Beat down, I went to meet the guys from the band, and convince them to go along with my shitty concept.

After a couple hours, they decided to create a miniature Burning Man. Weird, coming from a band that blows your head off with death-dance-prog-psych-metal-with-no-bass-and-female-vocals. They mentioned starting off as a no-wave act without Vanessa singing – but this struck me as useless trivia, since most people don’t really know what no-wave is. Come on, name someone other than James Chance who is no-wave. Nobody, right? And you only know about James Chance because everyone was into Contort Yourself a few years ago. No, ESG weren’t no-wave.

Dan talked about a bunch of other stuff I can’t print. Jeremy had already got drunk and embarrassed himself when we hung out earlier in the week, and made me swear I wouldn’t publish was he said – so basically they neutered my entire article.

No Dynamics are from Toronto, they have a 12” vinyl-only EP coming out in August on Rob Gordon's new label, and they’re really good. Here is what they have to say for themselves:

VICE: Did you have fun? Was this a shitty idea?

JEREMY: I had fun with a shitty idea. Maybe it’s not that shitty.

VICE: Did any of you argue about the sculpture? About other stuff?

DANIEL: I argued with Carl because he automatically thinks every idea Jeremy or I come up with is a bad one. He usually sees the error of his disapproval shortly after. Thus, while he didn’t initially see the awesomeness of a shitty tribute to the shittiest festival ever, Burning Man, he eventually saw the light and all was good. Every song we’ve ever played has gone through the same process of disapproval/approval. It is always initially crippling to my ego, but the eventual payoff of acceptance is greater than if Carl had thought any idea I had to be a good one to begin with. It’s like that notion of object appreciation through loss and eventual rediscovery. You never appreciated your wallet so much than after finding it under that movie theatre seat after a couple of days of shitting your pants.

VICE: What does the sculpture mean?

DANIEL: The sculpture means that No Dynamics is a huge fan of eccentric jocks and free blowjobs as art. It is an homage to the ethos of Burning Man, in miniature.

VICE: Is your sculpture ugly?

DANIEL: Yes. Our sculpture is ugly like all men are ugly.
JEREMY: All fuckin Popsicle structures are ugly. Except my cock.

VICE: Do you ever imagine yourself as a sculpture when you’re on stage? Does your imaginary sculpture look like the one you created?

JEREMY: All I imagine when I’m onstage is what my life is not. Sculptures are only a means to get laid… maybe. My imaginary sculpture is always the last girlfriend that left me. Hi Laura, you look good.

VICE: Will you keep it?

DANIEL: I will use the burnt Popsicle sticks as an anti-lubricant like they do in Africa because they are against wet vaginas there.

No Dynamics are Vanessa Fischer on vocals, Daniel Vila on guitars, Carl Didur on keys, and Jeremy Finkelstein on Jews.

(I'll be doing a second interview with the band which will be in the September issue of Vice. This one never made it due to logistics.)

Photo: http://www.areyoufamiliar.com/nd1_small.jpg -- Vanessa wasn't there so we dressed Dan's girlfriend up in a sweater turban and pretended her skin was darker.

Band Website: http://www.geocities.com/nononodynamics/